We all have those friends who take endless selfies, wWhose Facebook pages are that person making the same face, from the same angle over and over.
I've had lots of fun with some of the glamour apps, especially the ones that let you choose eyeliner and all the other makeup. Being the oldest, I never had anyone to teach me how to do makeup and if I'm lucky, I can get two lines on my eyelid without poking myself in the eye. Never mind cat-eyes or Cleopatra eyes or whatever is the rage these days! Plus anything with metallic stuff in it makes my eyelids swell and believe me, having marshmallows for eyes is not a good look!
If I want fat lips all I have to do is kiss a cat on the nose and WHAM, Mick Jagger lips! I don't need no stinkin' needles!
Make-up apps are great because I don't have to deal with expensive makeup and my way less-than-average expertise. Let's not even call it expertise. Let's call it...klutziness. I'm a makeup klutz!
The following pictures were made with a Japanese glamour shot app called Meitu. I do not recommend you get it, as it asks for some pretty sketchy permissions. If you don't know what that means, then you REALLY don't want to download it.
It likes to try to make you look as pretty as possible. And if possible, like an 11-yr-old Japanese girl.
Like this.
This is strange enough. But what if I push the envelope?
And glamourized.
I was making some seriously dorky faces and Meitu kept undorking them!
Somehow my eyes stay gorgeous. And my nose became plastic.
I tried a maniacal look.
Somehow I'm not so piratey here. And my teeth are so much whiter! Why are my eyebrows way up there?
There was a version of this face that I did so well that Meitu responded: "I do not see a human face in this picture."
This one is for my son. The Tiny Face. Babies make this one really well. It's harder when you are older.
I had one eye completely closed. Meitu had to open it. It's so GLAMOUROUS!
So far, no matter what I'd done, this app had really un-uglified some pretty good faces. But nothing was coming out even as close to as ugly as I wanted it to. Then came this.
HA! Let's see you glamourize THAT face!
TA DAH! What the hell is up with my chin?
And here are some more faces for which I didn't save the originals. Let your imagination be your guide.
This was a horrendous inbred cousin look and the app just made it cute.
Like the red dot and the lipstick over the tongue. Nice.
And for the record, not ONE DUCKFACE!